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Jonatan Gonte Kindh
Måns Tolsvägen 10
531 93 Lidköping

Tell your girlfriend

There just awesome, hade to share :)

Telefonångest

Just nu läser jag (och återpublicerar) en hel del om att vara introvert, en hel del slår mig hur passande det känns. En hel del återkommer också helt enkelt samma sak i olika texter, så jag försöker att inte upprepa för mycket här.

Holley Gerth lyckades dock sätta fingret rakt på något jag har jättesvårt för: Telefonsamtal

5) Offer another option besides talking on the phone.
Again, completely guilt-inducing but true. The phone strips conversations down to what stresses us out most–the verbal part. Being with you in person lets us see your facial expressions, gives us time to pause and process before we respond, and helps us use our amazing nervous system to your best benefit.

Introverts also often love to communicate in writing because it gets to the heart level, gives us time to think and lets us be very intentional about our words.

Again, this is not a personality trait–it’s a biological reality. Verbal communication skills reside in the left side of our brains. Written communication skills reside in the right side {which many introverts lean toward}. All communication is not created equal, and some forms are uncomfortable, anxiety-provoking and sometimes even downright painful for introverts–especially when we’re stressed or tired

I korthet på svenska: Telfonsamtal kapar ner konversationen till att enbart utgöras av den del som är svårast för oss introverta, vad som sägs verbalt. Att fysiskt träffas låter oss se ansiktsuttryck, ta pauser och bearbeta vad vi fått höra, det låter oss unyttja vårt nervsystem till det vi gör bäst.
Likaså föredrar introverta ofta textbaserad kommunikation, som låter oss tänka efter och vara medvetna om vilka formuleringar vi väljer.

Det här är bara en kort del. Här är alla delar av Halleys text:

7-Ways-to-Love-an-Introvert-by-Holley-Gerth

Läs gärna hela texten (ovanstående är bara rubrikerna) på Holleys blogg, det är värt din tid.

 

Care for Introverts AND Extroverts

One last, for now. This time about both introverts and extroverts.
Also, you’re not necessarily this or that, there is a sliding scale with these to terms in each end and us humans shattered between them.

How to: Care for introverts

How to: Care for extroverts

 

How to: Live with introverts

Yes, I know I published a lot of quotes from another how to just a few days ago.
But, I am an introvert, this is one of my favorite guides, and now I’ve finally ran across the source (and legal license for publishing).

 

Dr Carmellas Guide to understanding the introverted!

by RomanJones
Creative Commons License

This is just a small part of her eBook, available at Kindle.

- Varför kommer tomten inte in?
– Julen står för dörren!

image

Understanding introverts

Introverts tend to recharge by withdrawing from social occasions and other people, sitting in solitude or maybe talking to only one other trusted person.

Listen with care and interest. Introverted people like to know they are being heard but they are not going to struggle to ensure that you are listening. If they feel that you cannot be bothered to hang in there and truly listen, they will clam up and fail to articulate any further.

Expect introverts to listen to you, in depth. Before you think this is all one-sided, you’re in for a rude shock. Introverts love to listen to your side of things. […] If you have a problem or need advice, they will listen, wait till you’re done talking and then give advice or offer to think over what you’ve said and return with a solution or idea.

With introverts, a lot of information is processed after the interaction or event. This is why downtime and being away from other people is so important. […] An introvert finds instant processing of information during a social interaction nigh on impossible and hence can end up feeling highly distressed or needing to ”shut down” if pressed to make a decision on the spot or give an opinion there and then.

Do not perceive their quietness and unwillingness to hop on board immediately as a sign of rejection or exclusion; it is not the case.

Work with the introvert’s strengths. Some of them might include:

  • Being cautious, risk averse and reflective
  • Writing articulately
  • Thinking analytically
  • Staying calm during a crisis (unless overwhelmed); reflecting inner calm and peace
  • Conscientious and good at concentrating on tasks requiring focus
  • A great listener, a careful adviser
  • Being independent
  • Being tenacious and determined, willing to take the longer-term view
  • Empathic, diplomatic and willing to compromise

Living with an introvert

Realize that your introvert-in-the-house needs downtime. This is not to be taken as personal rejection or any aspersions being cast on you. This is about letting the introvert recharge.

Allow space. The introvert needs somewhere personal, quiet and undisturbed to retreat to within the home space. If this is not offered, the introvert can become stressed and tense, a feeling that can impact everyone in the household.

And for last:

Being shy is not the same as being introverted. While some introverts might be shy, it is a mistake to label all introverts as shy. Shyness is about fearing social contact and situations; introversion is about finding such situations exhausting and overwhelming if in too large a dose. That said, a shy introvert is probably experiencing a double dose of anxiety during social events.

Quotes from WikiHow’s article Understand Introverted People.
Shared under a CreativeCommons license
Creative Commons License

Ingemar Olsson i Redbergskyrkan

Det här är egentligen inte så nytt, jag har bara inte kommit mig för att peta upp några bilder förrän nu. I slutet av november hängde jag med mina föräldrar för att se en av farsans favoritartister, Ingemar Olsson.

Platsen var Redbergskyrkan i Göteborg,
bänkarna var lagom fyllda
och stämningen var på topp!

Ingemar Olsson i RedbergskyrkanKörläktare med instrumentIngemar Olsson i RedbergskyrkanIngemar Olsson i Redbergskyrkan

I can fake a smile
I can force a laugh
I can dance and play the part
If that’s what you ask
Give you all I am

I can do it

But I’m only human
And I bleed when I fall down
I’m only human
And I crash and I break down
Your words in my head, knives in my heart
You build me up and then I fall apart
‘Cause I’m only human

I can turn it on
Be a good machine
I can hold the weight of worlds
If that’s what you need
Be your everything

I’m only human
Just a little human

I can take so much
‘Til I’ve had enough

‘Cause I’m only human
And I bleed when I fall down

Delar av Human
av Christina Perri
& Martin Johnson

I’m the one that turns lifes into disaster, why would anyone stay close to me?

I am  alive, I have no plans to change that.
Neither do I have any plans to even check if someone is calling,
writing or something else, I just don’t have the energyy to care.

So simply, I am alive, I am not reachable.
No point in calling, no point in worrying.